


Because I Loved Him

by ladyflaneur



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Anxious Victor Nikiforov, Arranged Marriage, Caring Katsuki Yuuri, Character's Name Spelled as Viktor, Established Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov, Gift Exchange, M/M, Marriage Proposal, POV Third Person, POV Third Person Limited, Trigger Warning - Violence, VictUuri, Victor Nikiforov is Extra, Victor Nikiforov is a Big Softie, Victuri, Victuuri Summer Loving, Victuuri Summer Loving 2019, Vikturi, viktuuri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2019-09-13
Packaged: 2020-10-17 18:10:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20625362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyflaneur/pseuds/ladyflaneur
Summary: “Yuuri, I…” He breathed deep, preparing himself for what was about to come out of his mouth. “I love you so much. If I could marry you today, I would. But this morning, my father told me I was engaged. I'm getting married in less than a month. That's why I called you out here today. I had to tell you… that whatever this is…” Viktor began to choke on his own words. He didn't think he'd ever cried so hard in his entire life. “It has to end here.”(In which Viktor and Yuuri are both royalty, but not supposed to marry.)Editing by: @VividWinchesterProofreading by: @floaty_insomniac





	Because I Loved Him

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Rodinia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia/gifts).

> this is my first time entering a gift exchange and i'm beyond excited! enjoy!

**** “So your duties this week include regulating the tax riots in the eastern zone, attending the Altin v. Leroy trial, interviewing the…” Viktor’s mind slipped as Yurio, his knight, paced around his room and monotonously recited the notes that his father had addressed to him. It was the same thing, over and over again. Regulate, attend, interview. Regulate, attend, interview. As Yakov approached his old age, Viktor was finally beginning to kiss his childhood freedom goodbye. His father called his duties “princely training,” but Viktor knew that it was garbage. It was Yakov trying to avoid his own responsibilities because he was old. He already knew that it barely mattered. As soon as he got the approval of his father, he’d be the ruler of this kingdom. And lord, were there things he wanted to change.

“Your Highness? Are you listening?” Yurio’s tone (or lack thereof) shook Viktor, recapturing his attention to whatever he needed to do.

“Oh! Yes, of course. Carry on, sir.”

Yurio rolled his eyes and continued to read the paper in front of him. “Anyways, finally, as of today, you're engaged.”

“Huh?!”

Yurio gestured to the sheet on parchment with his free hand. “Says right here. Her name is… Countess Mila of St. Petersburg. Close family ties, nice woman, so on and so forth. You're meeting her in your gardens tomorrow. It says here to ensure that you dress and act accordingly; a failure of this marriage could result in a loss of alliance and possibly, depending on the damage, a physical political conflict,” He rolled up the paper and tucked it into his pocket. “That is all.”

“This can't be happening! Call my father to my study. I need to discuss the matter.” Viktor panicked, standing up and beginning to make himself presentable. He would never marry the woman, and he plans to make that very clear.

“Unfortunately, His Majesty is out of town for the next week. I said that to you earlier, but it appears as though that wasn't an apparent issue,” he rolled his eyes again and continued to the prince. “I understand your situation, your Highness, but I am in no position to act upon the matter. I'm afraid that is up to you. Now, I have other issues to attend to. You know what you must do if--”

“Contact Hasetsu _ .  _ Tell them I want to meet him tomorrow morning in the backroads between kingdoms. Specify ‘the normal spot’ and tell them that it is urgent.”

“Your Highness, I have a business to do. I cannot simply pause everything to mail a letter.”

“Yurio! You will contact them  _ immediately,  _ and that is an order! Now  _ go!” _

It was rare that Viktor showed anger. It was even rarer that he would raise his voice, especially to anyone of the royal staff. But today was different. Today was the beginning of the rest of his life, and it was surely not the life he ever planned on leading. He wasn’t sure how he felt about it, nor was he entirely sure about what to do with either of them. One of them would have to be let go. He just had to decide which would be easier.

He hoped that seeing him would help him to do so.

Yurio, Viktor’s personal knight, and the rest of Viktor’s general staff were the only people who knew about his secret relationship. Or, as of yesterday, his ‘affair.’ At least once a week, he would request a carriage to take him just past the border to meet him. His father deemed it incredible, he thought it was an amazing dedication to the regulation of border control. But if anything, it was the complete opposite. And only God knows what he would do if he found out that not only was he having an affair, he was having an affair with a  _ man _ .

For the past two years, he'd regularly been meeting Yuuri of Hasetsu. He’d met him on a business trip with his father, and it had started as a slow friendship. They were very similar, both young children destined to rule large kingdoms around the same age, so their closeness was almost expected. Their kingdoms were aligned, so it was never a problem for them to see each other. But when their friendship blossomed into something a little more, they decided it would be best for them to keep it secret. The two boys were so in love, it slipped both of their minds that this day would soon come. Now, he wasn't sure what he would do with him.

He wasn't even sure if he could keep him.

“Yuuri!” Viktor yelled as he watched him exit his carriage. Yuuri flashes a wry smile at him, as he continued to the grassy spot on the hill where the two of them spent most of their time together. Viktor instructed for Yurio to return in exactly two hours time, and had Yuuri’s carriage do the same. After that, he had no hesitation to run up to his lover and embrace him. 

They always met somewhere beautiful. The areas between kingdoms were often uninhabited because their rolling hills prevented construction. Yet to Viktor, that's what made the land so amazing. The hills were covered in sunflowers, and the occasional butterfly or swallow created such a picture-perfect beauty. It was a real shame that really only royalty ever came out here, and of course, it was never just to enjoy the scenery. He wished that everybody could come here--rich and poor alike. Maybe, they would even fall in love here, just like he had. Maybe, they would end it here, just like he'd have to do.

The hills suddenly didn't seem as beautiful anymore.

“I missed you,” Viktor says, finally breaking the hug. Yuuri smiled at him sweetly.

“Viktor, I saw you two days ago. You're getting as clingy as ever,” he kissed him softly. “Not that I mind it.”

The two of them went to sit in the grassy hills and admire the beauty of their surroundings. Often times, the two of them didn't speak. Not in a sense of awkwardness, but because they were so close they often didn't need to. When they met, it was just the two of them and the endless fields in front of them. Royalty and duties didn't matter. They were each other's escape, and it was just perfect.

They sat together on the hills, Viktor’s head on Yuuri’s shoulder, their hands resting on top of one another. Viktor was so entranced by the sweet air and the astounding love, he almost forgot why he came here today.

“Viktor, you said in your letter that this was urgent. Is something wrong?” Yuuri asked, his voice as gentle as ever. Even when he wasn't trying, he somehow always managed to make Viktor feel better, even in just the tone of his voice. Although, today, he found his sweet tone eerie. He only had one thought running through his head.  _ Not now. I can't break his heart right now. _

“Huh? Why… oh yes! It was nothing. I just missed you. I’m sorry if I interrupted anything important.”

Yuuri chuckled. Viktor could tell that he knew that there was more to the situation--he wasn't exactly subtle in the letter--but now wasn't the time to address it. Besides, if this was the last time he would ever see Yuuri in this context, he wanted to savor it for as long as possible. “Whatever you say, Viktor.”

And the two were silent again. Yuuri slowly moved his hand up and down Viktor’s back as he began to close his eyes. Yuuri hummed a soft tune--likely some traditional song from his own kingdom--but it put Viktor at ease. Although Yuuri was almost two full years younger, he often took the lead, and Viktor was okay with that. In all of his past relationships, it had always been Viktor, but there was something about Yuuri that just made him melt. But, today, he wished he wasn’t so perfect. If he wasn’t, maybe it would’ve been easier to end things. Maybe he wouldn’t have ever loved him in the first place.

“Viktor, I’m actually quite glad you called me out here today. You see, something happened with my parents a few days ago, and, well, I hope you won’t be mad at me, but…”

“Yuuri? What happened?” 

“Well, they began to bring up the whole ‘marriage’ talk. And when they began to look at possible fiancées, I just, well, I couldn’t handle it. I broke down, told them everything. Told them I was interested in men, told them that I was in love...”

Viktor looked indescribably worried. Maybe he’d never be able to marry the guy, but at least his father didn't have to know about it. But with such close ties with Hasetsu, maybe they would tell him everything. Oh god, he couldn't imagine what his father would do!

“And…?”

“Well, they were elated! I never knew, but my father’s parents were actually two women, so I had nothing to fear in telling them. They said that they never considered you because you were male, but said that they were beyond happy that it was you.”

“Yuuri, I  _ am _ happy, but my father doesn't know anything about this. What if they tell him?”

“I already mentioned that to them, and they're sworn to secrecy. But, they told me that, well, they want us to get married. They don't care whose kingdom we take, but they said they would be so happy if it was you. And Viktor, I would be too. I never asked for your hand in marriage because I never thought it would be possible, but now that I know that it is, I won't stop until I get it. Would you want that, Viktor?”

Viktor smiled at him, brighter than he thought he ever has. “Nothing would make me happier.”

“Then is this okay?”

“What do you mean?”

Yuuri didn't respond with anything but a kiss. It started soft, slow, but slowly picked up pace and intensity. He placed his hand on his chest and slowly pressed him against the grass, keeping his lips locked to him. He began to rub his hand up and down his body, but very gently, and only did what Viktor nodded the okay to. The two of them had never done anything like this. And  _ damn _ , did it feel good.

Yuuri only stopped when he placed a hand on Viktor’s cheek to find it wet.

He slowly opened his eyes to look at Viktor, welled with tears. He was so enthralled, he didn't even notice him crying. “Viktor!” he gasped. “Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?”

Viktor signaled Yuuri to back away and put his hands over his face. Letting Yuuri do this to him, as amazing as it was, was like  _ teasing  _ the poor boy. He wanted Yuuri to have him, but he knew it wouldn't be possible. He was just so damn caring, that he already knew that this would be hell to the both of them. 

He loved Yuuri so much, he couldn't even explain it.

“Yuuri… I can't do this,” was all Viktor managed to say. The thought of ending things with him was just so painful for him to speak.

“No, no, no, it's okay. It was just a thought. If you don't want to do anything like this right now, that's okay. Please don't worry about it. I'm so sorry if I upset you.”

“No, Yuuri, not that,” Viktor sat up to meet Yuuri. “I mean all of this. I mean us.”

“What are you saying?”

“Yuuri, I…” He breathed deep, preparing himself for what was about to come out of his mouth. “I love you so much. If I could marry you today, I would. But this morning, my father told me I was engaged. I'm getting married in less than a month. That's why I called you out here today. I had to tell you… that whatever this is…” Viktor began to choke on his own words. He didn't think he'd ever cried so hard in his entire life. “It has to end here.”

Yuuri wrapped his arms around Viktor. “There, there. Stop crying. I have no doubt in my mind that everything is going to be okay.”

“How, Yuuri? This is it. I have to meet Mila later today. I can’t go up against my father! What do I do?”

“Hold on… did you say Mila? As in, Countess Mila of St. Petersburg.”

“Yes. And that matters because…?”

“Viktor! This is great news! Mila is in love with my duchess, Sara. If you two get married, and then I convince my parents to let me marry Sara, then we’ll be okay! Don’t you see? We’ll just continue to see each other throughout.”

“Don’t you see? That's not enough. We won't be able to rule together. And I'm sure that we’ll both have to try and bear a child with them. The thought of it makes me feel ill! Could you imagine?”

“This… This is a fair point. Let me think. I’m going to figure something out.”

Yuuri was silent for a few moments as he was deep in thought. Viktor admired him. Even when he wasn't doing anything, he was still absolutely perfect. And to think, in a matter of months, he’d have to say goodbye to it all. Yuuri was the best thing that had ever happened to him, and he had no idea what to do without him.

“Okay,” Yuuri began, however, his face was still scrunched in confusion. He couldn't still be considering the idea, could he? “This one… I know, is a little far fetched, but I’d do anything for you. For us,” he grabbed Viktor’s hand and held it up to him, now appearing excited rather than fearful. “Screw kingdoms and ruling. Run away with me. We could make a home, right here, in the rural area. Both kingdoms we be secure with rulers. Mila would be happy in Moscow, and Mari could easily take over Hasetsu. And we’d be happily wed, without responsibilities looming over our heads or anyone telling us how our work should be done. It would just be the two of us and the rolling hills forever. Wouldn’t you like that?”

To Viktor, that sounded like an amazing idea. Ruling a kingdom always seemed like a drag, so a peaceful life with a loving husband seemed like complete perfection. But that brought up his next conflict: how should they execute his plan? And of course…

“Yuuri, it’s been your  _ dream _ to rule since you were a child. I can't let you give everything up just because my dad is a shithead. It would just be unfair to you.”

“You mean more time than any crown Jewels that would be placed on my head. Will it be a bittersweet goodbye? Of course. But it doesn’t change the way that I feel about you. If I could only have one or the other, it’s obvious as to what I’d pick.

“You.”

So Viktor went home and immediately decided to begin gathering everything together. Yurio was supportive of his plan and promised to swear himself to secrecy. Their story was as follows: In exactly one week’s time, Yurio and Viktor were to be set off to pay a visit to St. Petersburg for a surprise visit to Mila’s family. On the way, there would be an unfortunate accident where Viktor would supposedly lose his life. That way, nobody would ever come looking for him. And the best part? In order for Yurio to look injured, he promised Viktor that he could land a few punches on him upon arrival.

The plan was foolproof. Except for one, teeny tiny detail.

Three day’s time had passed. Viktor was so caught up in planning everything with Yuuri that it completely slipped his mind that he had plans to meet with Mila today. 

He only remembered when Yakov came storming into his room, angrier than ever. “Viktor Nikiforov! Would you like to explain why you weren’t in the courtyard an hour ago? Countess Mila has been waiting so long that she left! And I’m the one who had to make an excuse for your sorry ass,” he approached Viktor’s bed and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. He was so close to him that he could feel his breathing on his face. “You’d better have a damn good explanation for this, kid.”

“Father!” Viktor spurted out. Avoiding the subject, he continued with “You’re back home early!”

“I told you I would be in yesterday’s notes. You very much knew I would be. That is, unless you've been thinking about more important things again,” Yakov rolled his eyes and scoffed at the thought. “And clearly, since you managed to forget today, you have been. So would you mind telling me why?”

Viktor couldn't lie to his father. Ever since his mother had passed, he wanted to be there for him, which led him to being grounded in truth. Hopefully, he’d buy whatever fragments of the truth that Viktor could bend.

“Father, I’m so sorry, I guess it just slipped my mind–”

“Slipped your mind? She’s going to be your wife in a matter of months! So I suggest that you get your  _ fucking  _ act together if you want this crown!” He paused, taking a deep breath. “I don’t believe that for a second. So would you mind explaining to me the real reason? That is, unless it would trouble you more?”

“I cannot say…”

“Cannot say? You must have some nerve,” he picked up a framed photograph of Viktor’s mother. “Talk. Now. Unless you want this to go in the fireplace.”   


“Father, please! You can’t do that!” Viktor pleaded, standing up and trying to reason with him. Yakov had always had trouble with anger, but was always able to control himself in the end, especially in the presence of his son. But threatening him? Especially with a photo of his late wife. This was unusual. Which meant that Yakov was absolutely fuming, and that Viktor had seriously underestimated what this marriage meant. 

“You don’t understand, do you? We’re already on thin ice with St. Petersburg. This marriage is our one chance to fix that. Your failure to show up did not help to make things easier. So unless you speak, I’ll burn it right here,” he began to remove the photo from the frame.

“No! Stop it!” Viktor screamed, but not daring to lay a finger on him. He was helpless. Right now, he would have to choose between losing his father or his mother, and there was no breaking point. “Please, stop!”

But he didn’t. The photo was fully removed from the frame, firm in his father’s hands. “Clock is ticking, kid.”

Viktor shook with his decision. Why couldn’t it just be easy? Why couldn’t Yakov just love him for who he is? It would make everything so much easier, and to be honest, Yuuri would be a better ruler for Moscow than Mila ever would. But, here he was. His mom or dad? How on earth could he choose? He wanted both. He wanted everything to just turn out alright. For his father to accept him and his lover to cherish him and his fiancée to forgive him and his mother to stand beside him. His mother, whom he’d already lost once.

It was this final thought that broke him. “ _ Because I’m in love with someone else!” _

Yakov dropped the photograph on the ground in shock. “You  _ what? _ ”

“Father…” he inhaled sharply, recomposing himself before he began to explain. “I’ve been seeing them for almost two years. I promise, they’re good. And you’ll love them wholeheartedly. If you would just give me a chance, I could--”

“Two years? And you didn’t think to tell me this before I found you somebody to marry?” He scoffed and rolled his eyes, but followed him up with something semi-caring. “Who is she? If she fits my standards, maybe we can work something out.”   


Viktor knew that his father was doing something kind for him, and yet, he felt the most anxious he had during the entire conversation. Why? Because there was no way for him to avoid a direct question, and Yakov expected a girl.

“Well, you see…” he looked away from his father. For the first time in his life, he felt shame about who he loved. If he didn’t love him, he wouldn’t have to disappoint Yakov now. “I’ve been seeing… a man. I--” he stammered, barely being able to compose himself. “I’ve been seeing Yuuri of Hasetsu. And I love him, father.”

The first thing Yakov did was laugh. Not as though he thought he was joking, but as though it was the only thing he could do to keep him from exploding on him right then. “A male?” he chuckled again, before staring at Viktor with stone cold eyes. “You’re a fucking disgrace.”

“Father?”

He looked up at Yakov, whose hand immediately flung across his face. Viktor winced, and before he knew it, he was being swung at in the stomach, and the nose, and the shoulder. His father never hit him. Not once in his life. Yet, here he was now, being beaten black and blue by him. Slapping him across the face, kicking him in the gut, punching him in the eye. And he didn’t do anything to retaliate. He couldn’t even comprehend it. Sure, he got angry sometimes, but he was a peaceful man. And Viktor was never the point of his anger. So he let him. He let him for ten whole minutes, before he began to lose his ability to breathe in pain. And when he finished? He didn’t even say anything to him then. He felt so void, he couldn’t even cry.

“You’ll be taking a carriage to meet her tomorrow. You will visit her kingdom as an apology. And child, I swear to you, if things do not go according to plan, you can kiss your rule goodbye.”

With that, Yakov left in a firestorm, leaving Viktor alone to weep on his bed. His father had just hurt him, but he still loved him nonetheless. Leaving him like this was melancholy, but he’d do anything for the man he loved.

_ You can kiss your rule goodbye.  _ The phrase rang out in Viktor’s head.

Little did Yakov know, he already had. **  
**

Any semblance of sorrow Viktor had about leaving his kingdom had since been revoked. If his father would try to control him like that, then he had no problem leaving it for Yuuri. However, now, he was visiting her kingdom tomorrow.

Which meant he had to begin their plan of action  _ tonight. _

He informed Yurio of this, and had him secretly deliver the word of this to Hasetsu later that evening. But, if he was leaving, Yuuri wouldn't find out in time. So Viktor just had to pray that everything would go well on a rushed schedule.

He hoped Mila would understand.

And so, there he was. He was finally gathering all of his belongings. Clothing wise, he only packed a few of his riding clothes. There would be no need for much of any other type, but he decided it would be safe to bring one or two pieces of formal attire. With that, he only brought a long a few other very special things. Gifts from his mother, or Yurio, and even a very special letter from his father. It was old, but it reminded Viktor that at one point in his life, his father was a good man, And even once he was gone, he wanted to remember that.

Yurio returned very, very late that evening. When Yurio entered Viktor’s room, he was nearing slumber. Yurio, however, was completely exasperated. He slammed the door in a flash, shaking all of the belongings surrounding it. “Your Highness!” He shouted. “Please… you need to see this.” 

As it turned out, he had taken it upon himself to deliver the letter to Yuuri directly, to ensure that it did not meet the eyes of anybody who didn’t need to see it. Hasetsu had already written a reply.

So Viktor obliged, raising his head and slowly adjusting his eyes to read the letter.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t all that he wanted to see.

_ Dear Viktor, _

_ I admire your bravery for being able to act on such a whim. However, I don’t think I am ready quite yet. Please don’t worry, I want to be with you, but I would like to spend just a few more days with my family. I do hope you understand. _

_ My parents have granted us a living at their vacation cottage in coastal territory. It is nine hours north of Hasetsu. Yurio should be familiar with the location. They understand your circumstance and invite you to stay there for the next week until I am able to greet you. In the morning, it will be stocked with enough food and water for you to be able to stay. We will be receiving regular shipments monthly. _

_ In 10 days, I will meet you there. I do hope you will be well in that time. And in regards to this journey, I wish you the best of luck. _

_ Warmly, _

_ Yuuri. _

After he had fully read it, he met eyes with Yurio once again, tears welled inside of them. “10 days?” He asked. To a normal person, ten days alone certainly wasn’t ideal, but it was manageable. Viktor, however, was royalty. He had never been alone for a single day in his life. He barely knew how to cook, or clean, or anything that would allow him to get by alone. He’d had people doing his busy work his whole life. And now… “How am I going to be able to live without him for ten days?”

Yurio shrugged, for although not royal blood, he had spent his whole life in the same situation. “I can’t offer you any guidance, but I can most certainly be there. I will escort you there, and will stay with you for a few hours. I will help you get situated and tend to your needs until I am officially relieved of my duties to you. Upon Yuuri’s arrival, I will also visit regularly.”

“Please, Yurio, can’t you stay? Just for that time?”

“Your Highness…” he trailed, rubbing is temple with his two fore fingers. “I’d love to be able to supervise you until he gets there. However, if I do not return that night, they’ll send a search party. You will get caught if I’m not there to bear the bad news. And that… that would be an even greater risk than succeeding. You have to be able to do this. I believe in you.”

Viktor did not reply, but rose from his bed and sat at his desk. He immediately took out a lofty sheet of parchment and quill, writing frantically. 

“Your Highness, what are you doing?”

Viktor did not look to him while he was writing. “Do not call me ‘Your Highness’ anymore. Please refer to me as Viktor. I am no longer a prince. Please treat me as an equal.”

“With all due respect, sir--”

“No respect. No ‘sir.’ If anything, I should be the one calling you that.”

“You’re not making any sense Your-- I mean, Viktor. I’m just a knight. I don’t understand what you mean.”

Viktor turned from his desk and handed him the parchment. “This, Yurio, is what I mean”

Yuri paused for a moment, gazing over the paper, before he looked at him perplexed. “What is this?”

“Tomorrow, I’ll be dying. That means I need a will, right? So, I wrote one. Besides me, my father doesn’t have at suitors. Sure, Mila would be coronated as queen, but this land is a patriarchy and my father is not a progressive man. He wants a male. And I thought, who better than you?”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I want you to rule in my stead. But, Yurio, it will be no easy feat. For one, you will have to marry Mila. It will be tedious work. Running a kingdom is difficult, but, I know that you’ll be able to do it. That is, unless you don’t want to.”

Knights are trained their whole lives to be stern, and lack any extremity of emotion. In their lives, it was all about whomever they were protecting. Yurio was never speechless, and it was never, ever about him. Now, maybe it could be.

“Viktor… That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

Viktor grinned. “I thought so.

“Now, in order to make this official, I need somebody to reference it. Please sign it, and hide this paper somewhere safe. Show it to my father once you return. I think he’ll be quite excited when he sees who it is,” he stood from his desk and lowered his head towards him. “Congratulations, Your Majesty.”

Yurio never smiled. He didn’t laugh. But today, he beamed. He beamed as Viktor handed him the quill and as he signed his name in ink. Now, finally the both of them would be happy. Because in just a matter of hours, life as they both knew it, would change.

“Viktor?”

“Hmm?”

“Thank you. I truly do wish you the best.”

Viktor smiled. “As do I, Your Majesty.” **  
**

It was six the next morning. The sun still hung quite low in the sky and the palace was in a rare period of stillness. Nobody was awake yet, not even the king himself, except for the two boys in the middle of their escapade. They were meeting by their carriage at seven, meaning that Viktor had approximately one hour left in the place that he’d called home his whole life. He decided to wake early so that he’d have enough time to gather his things as well as to soak up everything he loved about the castle one last time. He strolled through it’s grand halls, the amazing ballroom, the kitchens, the courtyard, and of course, the royal quarters, to which he’d found himself back in his own living space. He nearly shed tears at the sight of all of them, only being able to compose himself by remembering why he’d decided to give them up.

He breathed in the air of his room one last time. He observed everything as best as he could, trying to engrave every last detail into his memory. The incricate walls, the enormous paintings, the beautiful lighting and the exquisite stained glass. He grew up with all of these things, and to think that this would be the last time he saw it? It didn’t add up in his head. He owed his life to this palace. His upbringing, his amazing mother, and even his very own lover are things that he never would’ve encountered without this very space. The royal life had treated him well, and to leave it all of such a whim, he almost felt  _ guilty _ . He didn’t want to say goodbye to it all so soon. 

_ If only my father would allow it… then we would be happy. Then he wouldn’t have to lose anymore of his family. _

He cringed at the thought. When his father woke up this morning, he would be alone. He would have no more family to comfort him and aid him through his journey. Which lead him to his next thought: was this really right?

Well, one thing was for certain, and that loving Yuuri was right. That spending his life with him was right. If anything was true in this world, was that he loved Yuuri, and that he would do anything for him.

Viktor boarded the carriage right on time. He hasn’t looked back since. **  
**

He arrived safely at the cottage later that evening. Yurio stayed with him long enough for him to get settled, but left shortly after. After the supply delivery, Viktor was completely and utterly alone. Alone with no pass time, no contact, and nobody to support him. The ten days in which he spent alone were a total and complete blur. He felt so alone that he didn’t even know how to describe it. He was sore from his father’s beatings and no soul was there to help him cope. It was the first time in his life he felt so broken.

_ It will be worth it _ , he constantly told himself.  _ It will all be worth it when I can spend the rest of my life with him. _

Those ten days were total and complete hell. To this day, it’s the worst period of time Viktor has ever experienced. To be so emotionally and physically hurt, and to be exposed to loneliness for the first time in his life: it was a recipe for disaster. But he continued nonetheless. He would carry himself, and he was determined that he would push through. _I want to marry him. I’m_ _going to marry him._

Viktor was damn near death by the time Yuuri arrived. He was at rock bottom: alone, emaciated, and exhausted. But ten days later, he was there, at the doorstep. Viktor was in bed at the time, passed out by pure pain and running a slight fever due to his neglecting. But when Yuuri arrived, he cared for him. He nurtured him and cooked for him and made sure that he was well-rested for recovery. So when Viktor woke to find himself there, with the sense of his lover’s soft skin against his, he had never felt so  _ alive _ .

“Yuuri…” his name slid off his tongue. He hadn’t spoken in days. “You’re here.”

Yuuri smiled his familiar, warm smile. The smile that always made Viktor’s cares melt away. The smile that made him fall in love with him. “Why wouldn’t I be?” he chuckled a bit, and ran a finger through his hair. “You’ve been forgetting about yourself Viktor. It’s a good thing I arrived when I did. You’ve ran yourself sick with this behaviour,” he placed a small kiss his neck, nuzzling himself between his shoulder blades. “Please, you can’t do this to yourself. I’m here. Everything is going to be okay.”

Somehow, Yuuri always knew what to say to him. He was sure that Yurio informed him of his health, and what had happened between him and his father. Viktor was always a fragile man, but Yuuri always healed him. He did today, and he would, for the rest of his life.

_ For the rest of his life. _

God, he had never been happier. 

He was teary eyed again, just like the last time he saw him. Last time, he was crying because he was afraid that he’d lose him. Now, he cried out of sheer happiness of keeping him. He was finally his, and he would always be.

“I love you, Yuuri.”

The words surprised him a little bit. The two did love each other, that fact was known. Yet despite this, neither of them had ever said it out loud to one another. Maybe it was because of fear. Maybe it was because of prohibition. But here he was now, with nothing holding him back anymore. He wanted to scream it out to the whole world, but first, he wanted to make sure that Yuuri would never forget it.

“I love you too, Viktor.”

Viktor smiled weakly, before coughing and rolling back onto his side. His head was killing him, his body was bruised, but he was loved. That was the only thing that mattered now.

“Say, Viktor,” Yuuri started. “I know we’re not princes anymore or anything, but there’s an engagement tradition in Hasetsu that I wanted to do for you. Well, not so much a tradition, more of an heirloom,” he was always profound with words. Yet, today, he was stammering just like Viktor would. He was nervous, so Viktor reached his hand over to his and squeezed it tightly, trying his best to ease it. Yuuri took a deep breath before reaching into his pocket and pulling out two golden rings. My, they were beautiful, and surely had to be expensive. They were simplistic, but that’s what made Viktor so enamoured with them. “These rings have been passed down in my family for ages. The pair symbolises good fortune and a healthy marriage. It’s what my mother and father wanted me to propose with, so… here I am.”

Viktor sat up on the edge of the bed to meet him, putting his arms around him. “They’re perfect,” he stared at the golden bands in his palm, gleaming in the dusty sunlight from the window. “How did you convince your parents to let you take them?”

“It was actually quite the opposite. I wanted Mari to use them for her and her husband, but my parents insisted. I might not be ruling, but I still am the true heir to their throne. So, they’re having me give them to you. And we will eventually pass them down to our oldest son, and he later will do the same for his own, so on and so forth. But for now, it’s our turn to wear them,” he slightly gestured for Viktor to extend his hand so he could slide the ring on it. Both their hands shook as they did so, for each of their turns. They stared at them in exasperation. Engagement, marriage, and eventually, children. As of today, they had turned from lovers to fiancés. It was no longer just silly child’s play anymore, and they now had physical proof of it, stationed on each of their left ring fingers. 

The two were learning to function as normal citizens together. They divided household chores, established meal time, and began to transform their living space into their own. Yuuri began to study herbalism, finding natural remedies and solutions to everyday problems that would otherwise require special shipments. Viktor learned to sew and hem, and now made most of their clothing by hand as needed. Yurio visited regularly after his coronation, and according to his word, Viktor’s father had since passed on. Often times, he would arrive with Mila, and although she still actively saw Sara (to which Yurio was fully aware), the two were about to bear their first child. Mari had successfully taken over Hasetsu, and turned an almost failing kingdom into a prosperous one, still unmarried. Viktor and Yuuri still actively visited Yuuri’s old land, and even had their wedding officiated there. As of now, Mari and her family doctor were searching for a woman willing to surrogate for the two. 

Now, it was five years later. Five years, where for the first time that Viktor could remember, everyone was happy.

Viktor and Yuuri had been married for three years now. Finally, the two had found a very kind woman who served as a surrogate and they delivered a healthy child, biologically Yuuri’s, during their first year of marriage: a baby girl named Annabel. Now, a different woman was carrying their second child, biologically Viktor’s, and was due in the autumn time. The two had their fingers crossed that they’d give birth to a son.

Now that Yurio’s rule over Moscow was in full swing, the couple was granted access to visit there anytime. He and Mila had three children, a crazy phenomenon of triplet boys. It was crazy for Viktor to think of him as a father now, but at the same time, so was he. As their children were so close in age, they tried their best to have them see each other weakly, and hopefully a friendship would be born.

As for Mari, she had finally gotten married, but had no intention of having children of her own. She said that she’d like her ruler to be one of Yuuri’s children, and the two had agreed to that. Hasetsu was still thriving, and was in a better place that it had been in almost a century.

So, everything was well. Everybody’s lives were perfect, and every single person involved was happy. The royal life was slowly fading behind Viktor and Yuuri, and now, the life they had here was finally their own. Material wise, they had so much less now: less clothing, less money, less food, less possessions. And yet, they felt the most full than they ever had before. Viktor had thought it once, years ago, and the thought never faltered. For the first time in both of their lives, even after giving everything up, they felt more alive than they ever had.

How?

They found it in love.


End file.
